Learning Is Fundamental

There are three things about pregnancy that are totally awesome, which go a long way in balancing out the other 974 things that are not so awesome.

  1. You get a 10-month reprieve from your period. I can’t overemphasize how great this is.
  2. You get a reprieve from cleaning out your cat’s litter box.
  3. You get to learn all kinds of Fun Facts that you either ignored or were never taught in your 8th-grade biology class. SUCH AS: Around 15 weeks of gestation, your fetus begins to sense light sources, so if you shine a flashlight at your belly, he or she will possibly turn their head away. WHAT KIND OF MAD SCIENCE IS THIS SHIT? To me, that is so cool. I can’t feel fluttering or kicks yet, but my baby is already practicing for the moment when I try to wake up her 16 year-old ass around noon on a Saturday, and she yells, “MOOOOMMMM. Turn. Off. The. Light. I’m not kidding.”
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